My Story

On February 16, 1999, I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I was five years old.

Since I was so young when I was first diagnosed, I didn’t understand what was happening to me. The first thing I asked was if I was going to die. When my parents and doctors assured me that I would be fine, I went on living my life. I didn’t think much of it until my kindergarten teachers made me stand up on a chair in front of my whole grade to explain what it was and that it was not contagious. Ever since that moment, I felt different then anybody else my age. I tried to live my life as any normal five year old would, except I was forced to grow up faster then any of my peers. Not many five year olds had to count the carbohydrates for everything they ate, let alone give themselves shots multiple times a day. After living with diabetes for almost fifteen years, you think I would start to get used to it, but its one of those things that you never get used to.

I tried to deny the fact that I had diabetes because I didn’t like feeling different then everyone else. Denying this extremely important aspect of my life ended up being very harmful to my health. I would refuse to test my blood sugar whenever I was with my friends because it singled me out. When I didn’t test my blood sugar, I wouldn't know how much insulin to give myself. When I would eat, I would either forget or just wouldn’t give myself insulin because I considered it a hassle. Because I avoided it, I didn’t realize how much damage I was really doing to my body. I had always ignored what could happen to my health in the future and another event in my life made me ashamed of my diabetes even more.

In 2010, my grandpa passed away. He was diagnosed with diabetes two or three years after I was diagnosed. Like me, he decided to ignore the fact that he had a very serious illness, except he damaged his body to the point where there was no way to reverse what was already done. He had heart failure, kidney cancer, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, dementia, not to mention his toe that had to be amputated due to an infection that didn’t heal and his broken neck.

Many of his diseases could have been avoided if it wasn’t for diabetes. Diabetes is what ultimately killed my role model. His passing made me angry at diabetes and as a result, I started acting out even more against my diabetes. I did even less testing and gave myself almost no insulin whatsoever. I went to the doctor after almost a year of this behavior and figured out that the average amount of sugar in my blood was over 11%. Normal is anywhere under 6%. Mine was almost twice the average - which was definitely a wake up call. After this, I had to face the reality of this disease. If I kept treating my body this way, I would keep adding problems that would make my life harder then ever before. 

While that woke me up, it did not do so for very long. Two doctors appointments ago, the first doctor appointment I had been to since being away in college, my A1c was up to 13. This was like a slap in the face. I was embarrassed to be sitting there while my doctor just looked at me, disappointed. Going back a month later, I had lowered it to 10.9. While this was an improvement, I still have a long way to go before I can actually say that I am proud of myself and the way I take care of my health. 

So, all in all, this blog is my way of getting my story out there and hopefully helping other people with diabetes realize the importance of maintaining a healthy lifestyle. While I am so far away from doing that myself, I hope others will take the journey with me. But this first thing you have to do is want it for yourself. If someone else is telling you to be healthy, that's great, but you have to really want it for yourself in order to stick with it. 

Not only am I hoping that this helps other get their lives together, but I am also hoping that I can refocus my life on those things that are truly important. I need to better my lifestyle and I need to start somewhere, so why not the internet where I have millions of people to motivate me?